diff --git a/wp-admin/about.php b/wp-admin/about.php
index 0c83f39e25..2328f60660 100644
--- a/wp-admin/about.php
+++ b/wp-admin/about.php
@@ -19,7 +19,7 @@ include( ABSPATH . 'wp-admin/admin-header.php' );
 
 <h1><?php printf( __( 'Welcome to WordPress %s' ), $display_version ); ?></h1>
 
-<div class="about-text"><?php printf( __( 'Thank you for updating to the latest version. WordPress %s makes your writing experience even better.' ), $display_version ); ?></div>
+<div class="about-text"><?php printf( __( 'Thank you for updating to WordPress 3.7! You might not notice a thing, and we&#8217;re okay with that.' ), $display_version ); ?></div>
 
 <div class="wp-badge"><?php printf( __( 'Version %s' ), $display_version ); ?></div>
 
@@ -34,65 +34,46 @@ include( ABSPATH . 'wp-admin/admin-header.php' );
 </h2>
 
 <div class="changelog">
-	<h3><?php _e( 'Colorful New Theme' ); ?></h3>
-
-	<div class="feature-section images-stagger-right">
-		<img alt="" src="<?php echo is_ssl() ? 'https://' : '//s.'; ?>wordpress.org/images/core/3.6/twentythirteen.png" class="image-66" />
-		<h4><?php _e( 'Introducing Twenty Thirteen' ); ?></h4>
-		<p><?php printf( __( "The new default theme puts focus on your content with a colorful, single-column design made for media-rich blogging." ) ); ?></p>
-		<p><?php _e( 'Inspired by modern art, Twenty Thirteen features quirky details, beautiful typography, and bold, high-contrast colors &mdash; all with a flexible layout that looks great on any device, big or small.' ); ?></p>
-	</div>
-</div>
-
-<div class="changelog">
-	<h3><?php _e( 'Write with Confidence' ); ?></h3>
-
-	<div class="feature-section images-stagger-right">
-		<img alt="" src="<?php echo is_ssl() ? 'https://' : '//s.'; ?>wordpress.org/images/core/3.6/revisions.png" class="image-66" />
-		<h4><?php _e( 'Explore Revisions' ); ?></h4>
-		<p></p>
-		<p><?php _e( 'From the first word you write, WordPress saves every change. Each revision is always at your fingertips. Text is highlighted as you scroll through revisions at lightning speed, so you can see what changes have been made along the way.' ); ?></p>
-		<p><?php _e( 'It&#8217;s easy to compare two revisions from any point in time, and to restore a revision and go back to writing. Now you can be confident that no mistake is permanent.' ); ?></p>
-	</div>
+	<h3><?php _e( 'Background Updates' ); ?></h3>
 
 	<div class="feature-section col two-col">
 		<div>
-			<h4><?php _e( 'Improved Autosaves' ); ?></h4>
-			<p><?php _e( 'Never lose a word you&#8217;ve written. Autosaving is now even better; whether your power goes out, your browser crashes, or you lose your internet connection, your content is safe.' ); ?></p>
+			<h4><?php _e( 'Updates While You Sleep' ); ?></h4>
+			<p><?php _e( 'With WordPress 3.7, you don&#8217;t have to lift a finger to apply maintenance and security updates. Most sites are now able to automatically apply these updates in the background, though some configurations may not allow it.' ); ?></p>
+			<p><?php _e( '&rarr; This site <strong>is</strong> able to apply these updates automatically. Cool!' ); ?></p>
+			<p><?php printf( __( '&rarr; This site <strong>is not</strong> able to apply these updates automatically. But we&#8217;ll email %s when there is a new security release.' ), esc_html( get_site_option( 'admin_email' ) ) ); ?></p>
 		</div>
 		<div class="last-feature">
-			<h4><?php _e( 'Better Post Locking' ); ?></h4>
-			<p><?php _e( 'Always know who&#8217;s editing with live updates that appear in the list of posts. And if someone leaves for lunch with a post open, you can take over where they left off.' ); ?></p>
+			<h4><?php _e( 'More Reliable Than Ever' ); ?></h4>
+			<p><?php _e( 'The update process has been made even more reliable and secure, with dozens of new checks and safeguards.' ); ?></p>
+			<p><?php _e( 'You&#8217;ll still need to click &#8220;Update Now&#8221; once WordPress 3.8 is released, but we&#8217;ve never had more confidence in that beautiful blue button.' ); ?></p>
 		</div>
 	</div>
 </div>
 
 <div class="changelog">
-	<h3><?php _e( 'Support for Audio and Video' ); ?></h3>
+	<h3><?php _e( 'Create Stronger Passwords' ); ?></h3>
 
-	<div class="feature-section images-stagger-right">
-		<div class="video image-66"><?php
-			$sample_video = ( is_ssl() ? 'https://' : 'http://s.' ) . 'wordpress.org/images/core/3.6/sample-video';
-			$args = array(
-				'mp4' => "$sample_video.mp4",
-				'ogv' => "$sample_video.ogv",
-				'width' => 625,
-				'height' => 360,
-			);
-			// Opera 12 (Presto, pre-Chromium) fails to load ogv properly
-			// when combined with ME.js. Works fine in Opera 15.
-			// Don't serve ogv to Opera 12 to avoid complete brokeness.
-			if ( $GLOBALS['is_opera'] )
-				unset( $args['ogv'] );
-			// Our current ME.js API is limited to shortcodes in posts.
-			echo wp_video_shortcode( $args );
-		?></div>
-		<h4><?php _e( 'New Media Player' ); ?></h4>
-		<p><?php _e( 'Share your audio and video with the new built-in HTML5 media player. Upload files using the media manager and embed them in your posts.' ); ?></p>
+	<div class="feature-section col two-col">
+		<div>
+			<p><?php _e( 'Your password is your site&#8217;s first line of defense. It&#8217;s best to create passwords that are complex, long, and unique. To that end, our password meter has been updated in WordPress 3.7 to recognize common mistakes that can weaken your password: dates, names, keyboard patterns (123456789), and even pop culture references.' ); ?> <?php _e( 'Try it out on the right.' ); ?></p>
+		</div>
+		<div class="last-feature">
+			(Actual password meter demo)
+		</div>
+	</div>
+</div>
 
-		<h4><?php _e( 'Embed Music from Spotify, Rdio, and SoundCloud' ); ?></h4>
-		<p><?php _e( 'Embed songs and albums from your favorite artists, or playlists you&#8217;ve mixed yourself. It&#8217;s as simple as pasting a URL into a post on its own line.' ); ?></p>
-		<p><?php printf( __( '(Love another service? Check out all of the <a href="%s">embeds</a> that WordPress supports.)' ), 'http://codex.wordpress.org/Embeds' ); ?></p>
+<div class="changelog">
+	<div class="feature-section col two-col">
+		<div>
+			<h3><?php _e( 'Improved Search Results' ); ?></h3>
+			<p><?php _e( 'Search results are now ordered by how well the search query matches a post, instead of ordered only by date. For example, when your search terms match a post title, that result will be pushed to the top.' ); ?></p>
+		</div>
+		<div class="last-feature">
+			<h3><?php _e( 'Better Global Support' ); ?></h3>
+			<p><?php _e( 'Localized versions of WordPress will receive faster and more complete translations. WordPress 3.7 adds support for automatically installing the right language files and keeping them up to date.' ); ?></p>
+		</div>
 	</div>
 </div>
 
@@ -101,35 +82,17 @@ include( ABSPATH . 'wp-admin/admin-header.php' );
 
 	<div class="feature-section col three-col">
 		<div>
-			<h4><?php _e( 'Audio/Video API' ); ?></h4>
-			<p><?php _e( 'The new audio/video APIs give developers access to powerful media metadata, like ID3 tags.' ); ?></p>
+			<h4><?php _e( 'More Background Updates (Experimental)' ); ?></h4>
+			<p><?php _e( 'Want WordPress to always update automatically, even for major feature releases? Want to always keep a certain plugin up to date in the background? WordPress 3.7 comes with fine-grained update controls for developers and systems administrators.' ); ?></p>
 		</div>
 		<div>
-			<h4><?php _e( 'Semantic Markup' ); ?></h4>
-			<p><?php _e( 'Themes can now choose improved HTML5 markup for comment forms, search forms, and comment lists.' ); ?></p>
+			<h4><?php _e( 'Advanced Date Queries' ); ?></h4>
+			<p><?php _e( 'Developers can now query for posts within a date range, or that are older than or newer than a specific point in time. Or get really fancy: all posts written on Friday afternoons? Not&nbsp;a&nbsp;problem.' ); ?></p>
 		</div>
 		<div class="last-feature">
-			<h4><?php _e( 'JavaScript Utilities' ); ?></h4>
-			<p><?php _e( 'Handy JavaScript utilities ease common tasks like Ajax requests, templating, and Backbone view management.' ); ?></p>
+			<h4><?php _e( 'Multisite Improvements' ); ?></h4>
+			<p><?php _e( '<code>wp_get_sites()</code> allows developers to easily get an array of all the sites on your network without resorting to a direct database query &mdash; just one of many improvements to multisite in WordPress 3.7.' ); ?></p>
 		</div>
-	</div>
-
-	<div class="feature-section col three-col">
-		<div>
-			<h4><?php _e( 'Shortcode Improvements' ); ?></h4>
-			<p><?php _e( 'Search content for shortcodes with <code>has_shortcode()</code> and adjust shortcode attributes with a new filter.' ); ?></p>
-		</div>
-		<div>
-			<h4><?php _e( 'Revision Control' ); ?></h4>
-			<p><?php _e( 'Fine-grained revision controls allow you to keep a different number of revisions for each post type.' ); ?></p>
-		</div>
-		<div class="last-feature">
-			<h4><?php _e( 'External Libraries' ); ?></h4>
-			<p><?php
-				/* translators: placeholders 2, 3 and 4 are version numbers */
-				printf( __( 'New and updated libraries: <a href="%1$s">MediaElement.js</a>, jQuery %2$s, jQuery UI %3$s, jQuery Migrate, Backbone %4$s.' ), 'http://mediaelementjs.com/', '1.10.2', '1.10.3', '1.0' ); ?></p>
-		</div>
-	</div>
 </div>
 
 <div class="return-to-dashboard">
diff --git a/wp-admin/credits.php b/wp-admin/credits.php
index 547a7afc9b..059adc7c4f 100644
--- a/wp-admin/credits.php
+++ b/wp-admin/credits.php
@@ -81,7 +81,7 @@ include( ABSPATH . 'wp-admin/admin-header.php' );
 
 <h1><?php printf( __( 'Welcome to WordPress %s' ), $display_version ); ?></h1>
 
-<div class="about-text"><?php printf( __( 'Thank you for updating to the latest version. WordPress %s makes your writing experience even better.' ), $display_version ); ?></div>
+<div class="about-text"><?php printf( __( 'Thank you for updating to WordPress 3.7! You might not notice a thing, and we&#8217;re okay with that.' ), $display_version ); ?></div>
 
 <div class="wp-badge"><?php printf( __( 'Version %s' ), $display_version ); ?></div>
 
diff --git a/wp-admin/freedoms.php b/wp-admin/freedoms.php
index 22d7a0f782..2f8fce4f5b 100644
--- a/wp-admin/freedoms.php
+++ b/wp-admin/freedoms.php
@@ -19,7 +19,7 @@ include( ABSPATH . 'wp-admin/admin-header.php' );
 
 <h1><?php printf( __( 'Welcome to WordPress %s' ), $display_version ); ?></h1>
 
-<div class="about-text"><?php printf( __( 'Thank you for updating to the latest version. WordPress %s makes your writing experience even better.' ), $display_version ); ?></div>
+<div class="about-text"><?php printf( __( 'Thank you for updating to WordPress 3.7! You might not notice a thing, and we&#8217;re okay with that.' ), $display_version ); ?></div>
 
 <div class="wp-badge"><?php printf( __( 'Version %s' ), $display_version ); ?></div>